I have a job interview at LA Fitness Tuesday morning. It's for the position of Training Assistant Manager. From what I can tell it means I'll be selling (ugh) personal training sessions/packages to members and doing preliminary fitness screenings. So... it sounds like the correct step to take if I'm curious about becoming a personal trainer. I just don't like the sales aspect of it because I don't think I'm a sales person but Luke reminded me that I can sell things I believe in which is true. And I do believe that if people are serious about getting into shape a session or two with a personal trainer would be a great idea. I also spent a lot of time reading reviews of people who have worked for LA Fitness and 95% of them were bad news. Luke was also quick to remind me that people are more inclined to write bad things about their employer than good tings.

I'm so glad I keep him around.

So that's where it stands right now. I'm hopeful and confident that the Lord will place me where He wants me.

In other news it's 9:15am and I have already worked out for the day thank goodness. Now I have to shower and head over to the girls' place (my former abode) and catch up with them for a few hours before the Man and I head out to find antlers for our Halloween costume. Or toy guns. If we find antlers we're going to wear those and shirts with a whole bunch of stars drawn on them and when people ask what we are we shall say, "Star bucks." If we cant find antlers and only find toy guns then we're going to wear the same shirt but be shooting stars. I was clever this year. Should be a good time at Luke's cousin's party tonight.

That's really all I got. The Lord is good. My endorphins are going. Today should be a good day.

This is a story that happened Thursday. It is a story of revelation and clarity. It is a story of how Yahweh sometimes decides to deal with you and show you things via a fire hose. It is a great personal story of faith for me, and I hope it turns out to be something similar for someone else.

The story must start at the end. The end of the story is that Thursday night I went to sleep knowing I had two job interviews for two completely different jobs. One was for an Office Manager type position. One was for a Front Desk position at a 24-Hour fitness.

The office job: Answer phones, fill out and file paperwork, a lot of computer related data entry and upkeep, some light warehouse work. Just me and my boss in the office for the most part except there are times when he's gone to Bend or Medford or what have you and it would be just little ol' me running the show. He has been with the company for 20 years. The lady who was there previously had been there for 8. 30 hours a week or so.

The 24 Hour Fitness job. Scan membership cards, sell products, handle billing inquiries and solve billing problems, hand out towels, check locker rooms periodically, etc. Not a hard job.

Here's where the story starts to pick up. I found out about the 24 Hour job first and got REALLY excited. After all, this position wasn't posted anywhere. I went to their web site and looked to see if they had any job openings and sure enough they did and sure enough I applied. I felt good because I wasn't being a sheep and just following ads on Craig's List. Why did I want to work there? Well, as anyone who has known me for more than a year or so will be aware of I go through fitness, health, wellness, nutrition, etc. spurts. I get really, really into it and wanna workout all the time and eat well and all that jazz. I've been in one of these phases for the past 3-4 months, but especially the past month. The Lord has really laid on my heart the desire for a healthy lifestyle for the Man and I. I've been reading books, articles online, finding and cooking uber healthy meals for the Man and I and even starting to consider becoming a personal trainer/life coach somewhere down the road. This is why the job at 24 Hour excited me because, though it would be an easy job (as told to me at my interview yesterday) it would give me a chance to see if this is an environment I could stay in long term. I could pick the brains of the personal trainers and see what it's like. I could talk to customers and hopefully get to know a couple and build a rapport with them which is something i love doing. I could also (I'm pretty sure) get a free membership which means I could see if this "fitness spurt" could evolve into a life change and if it's something I could motivate others to do. I got really excited about this job interview.

And then I got the call for the office job. Now here's the thing. These office jobs are the ones I've been going after for the past few months. Why? Because I can do them. I can work on a computer. I can talk to people in person or on the phone. I can work in a fast paced environment with multiple distractions and still get the job done and done well. This is all stuff I CAN do. But... when I was talking to the gentleman i would interview with, and he told me the previous employee had been there 8 years, a little part of me died inside. Eight years? I thought. Could I see myself sitting behind a desk like that for 8 years? It would be steady. No surprises. Not a lot of change, though. Same thing day in day out after awhile. Eight years. Sigh.

And then i all started to come together. The Lord began to show me everything in one big flash. He showed me that while the office job is what I CAN do, a big part of me believes that the 24 Hour job is much more closely related what i WANT to do, or am MEANT to do. Think about it... if I become a personal trainer I could motivate, counsel and encourage people, I could stay healthy myself and inspire others to do the same because I was a former overweight person, I could do a little self-marketing, some administrative work, and maybe someday create my own schedule. I like it. i think it utilizes many of my God given skills & abilities.

For further revelation from the good Lord, He showed me about how this has all been developing over the past few months. Everyone who has said to me, "The Lord is preparing a job for you" or "In His timing" or any other Christian cliche that made me want to punch them in the face sometimes... I think they were right which is really annoying because I hate sayings like that (unless there's a personal story or there is a valid application to it)... but in this instance I think it's true. I think the Lord has been cultivating this desire in me for a long time, and especially during this season of unemployment where I've been telling people that sometimes it's a blessing because it's given me time to focus on this lifestyle change. I just really feel like He threw all this clarity at me and the light was so bright without the scales on my eyes that I haven't been able to fully process all of it. I kept telling Lucas, "There's just too much of God in this. It hurts my head."

So I went to my interviews yesterday and I tried my best to make both potential employers believe that I was the candidate they wanted. I should hear Tuesday if I get called back for a second interview with 24 Hour. And I should hear sometime Wednesday or Thursday about the office job. In the mean time I'm going to spend a good chunk of time this weekend checking out other gyms and fitness clubs in the Portland area and applying to them because... I think this is what I want right now for my life.

It's a story of everything and nothing. But it's my story. And it has given me peace when I look back on the past four months of unemployment.

I have had the same glasses for the past 5-6 years which is REALLY bad when your eyes are as bad as mine. On a related note, because my eyes are so bad my glasses also cost between 350-400 which is why I've had the same glasses for so long.

Well, thanks to UPS' wonderful benefits (which partially makes up for them sucking away my husband's life at Christmas) I now have new glasses.

This past Saturday Lucas had a show. He called me right after it was done to tell me the car was dead. He called the mechanic, called some other people, and finally it ended up being towed to our mechanic. During this time I had the most pathetic freak out at the Lord I think I've ever had. It was awful and emotional and I was just so tore up because I just don't know what else Luke and I are supposed to do. I'm doing everything I can to get a job, etc.

Well, in the midst of the freak out I decided to call every store I'd be willing to work at in the local mall. I find out that both Gap and Old Navy are hiring and that their application process happens online. Fine. So that night I applied for 2 different Gap's and 2 different Old Navy's. These are not ideal jobs, but they are jobs and so I swallowed my pride down 3 or 4 times and did it... not really thinking anything of it. I've gotten to the point where I just don't expect to ever get a job. Sad but true.

This afternoon I'm hanging out with Desiree and grab my phone to see what time it is only to realize I had a missed call, but no voicemail. So I use Des' phone to call the number back to see who it is and it's one of the Gap's I applied to...

"Hi Toni. I saw your application and wanted to know if you were still interested in working for us?"
"Very much so, yes."
"Okay, then I'll plan on seeing you tomorrow at 2:30."
"Umm, I have a dentist appointment during that time. is there any way we can do it earlier or later?"
"Actually no. Scheduling is really tight right now and I'm going to be out of town this weekend so we could try for something next week..."
"Ya know, I would much rather interview with you than go to the dentist so I'll see you tomorrow afternoon."

Fabulous.

Gap is not ideal. But I've already decided that should I get the job I'm going to try and work my tail off to get to management. I can work retail if I'm in management. I would be a good manager too, I think. Plus the discount, I've heard, is quite phenomenal.

Lots more to say I think, but Luke will be gone all weekend which will give me ample time to update more should the need arise.

Please pray.

My Mom got her test results back today and...

SHE IS CANCER FREE!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hallelujah! Praise the Lord!

There are two slightly bad things... One, the type of cancer she had (I love past tense!) is known to come back--specifically come back in the brain. What they advised her to do is to have 3 weeks of radiation therapy to kill any cancer that may be there. Radiation therapy on the brain is known to cause memory loss It an be as small as her just forgetting where she put her keys to becoming the onset of dementia. She has decided to go through with it, and I have mixed feelings about it, but I feel the LORD has gotten her this far so who am I to argue?

PRAISE THE LORD!